This life is not as easy as we want it to be. Some parts, we had to fall and lose. Or made mistakes. Or confused and then ended up with wrong choice. Or maybe we had taken the best way we could see, somehow it happened far from what we expected. And we might feel regret.
For some people (like me), those circumstances could easily take me down. Sometimes it’s not that hard to recover from the sadness and go back to continue what should be done, when things are not so destructive to the heart. Just wipe the tears, accept the way it is, cheer up, get some ice cream and chocolate, learn from the mistakes, and move on. For example: got D for one horror subject when I was in college, haha..
But some things are unforgivable. I could think over it for so long. It’s hard to forget and move on. Even after years gone, I still can feel the regret and shed tears remembering back that particular memories. About how I was doing wrong, how I could choose that way, how I let go what I should’ve not, how I was so ignorant for something, how I was so weak and not try a bit harder and higher, and so on. I’ve been so much upset. And all these matters never end, if I keep questioning so. #sigh.
If only I could go back in time, of course I would fix it and do different. But, it’s impossible and stupid, living in “if”. Still, the best way to get rid of is to let go. I have to let go whatever happened, accept it wholeheartedly, even though it is difficult and so hurting. I maybe can’t erase the regret and hurt inside my heart, forever.. but I am so grateful to be given a clear mind to think that everything must go on. What we’ve lost, the sadness and pain, just hide it. Pretending like everything’s just fine. Get busy and be happy, it will lessen the burden. For me, it works. Because I don’t want to end up stucked and become crazy. This life is too worthy to live only in sadness. For some mistakes done in life, fortunately they teach us to be wise, maturer, and not fall to the wrong thing twice. It’s ok to regret, but don’t forget to learn. And for something we can’t really bear of, it means we are being trained to be strong. I will not force to forget the memories, just let it stay, somehow it is part of my life…for bitter and sweet…